Our True Identity

Many years ago, I was in the beginning stage of my search to “find myself.” I had absolutely no clue who I was, and what my purpose was in this life.

Mainly, I did all the things that were expected of me, and depended on the thoughts and opinions of those around me to dictate what I “should” or “shouldn’t” be.  During this time, I did the best I could with my responsibilities, tried to live a good life, and  loved my family and friends in the best way I knew.  But I was aware that something was missing inside of me.

Basically, I was floating. 

I didn’t realize at the time, that the true, life changing search would not be directed toward myself…ultimately, the search would be to get to know God, which would lead me to loving and serving Him.

I had no way of knowing that my true identity wasn’t contained in what the world thought of me.

My identity is that I am a child of God…and I was created to be with Him for eternity.  He created me (just as He created you) because I was meant to be here…at this moment in history.  I was created to be called to His Kingdom…just as you were! We are all an integral part of His Salvation Plan and He is calling us to spread the Love of Jesus through The Gospel…are we willing to answer that call?

What could possibly be a more important purpose than that?

Today, I found some notes regarding The Beatitudes, that I had written back in those early years…when my search had just begun.  The ideas were found in an awesome book, “God’s Psychiatry,” and I would like to share what reached out to me, and stayed in the back of my mind all through the years:

To be poor in spirit means to give up our pride

To mourn means to be penitent to the point of surrendering ourselves

Meekness means that we must surrender our very selves to the plans and purposes of God

Our hunger for God means turning away from our ambitions for all things else

To be merciful means to pay good for the evil we have received

For purity we must give up all things impure

To make peace is wholly to choose God

These are the seven ingredients of righteousness. They must be bought at a price.

Blessed are those who pay the price, “for theirs is the Kingdom of God.”

My hope is that you are blessed with the knowledge that you are a Child of God…that YOU were specifically created to spend eternity with Him.  Don’t waste the opportunity to get to know God, and to understand His purpose in your life.  He is waiting for you.

Matthew 5:1-12

God’s Psychiatry by Charles Allen

 

Advertisement

Open Your Wounded Heart

For about the last week, an image has been imprinted on my mind.  This same image, and what I believe is the meaning behind it, will not leave my thoughts.

I believe that I am being prodded to share what has been given to me.

Hopefully, your heart, no matter how wounded it is, or how high you have built your wall up to block the pain of those wounds, will open up to the pure love and mercy that only Jesus can bring.

Whenever I gaze at a Crucifix, or meditate on Jesus hanging on the cross and dying for me, the image that I see is what I would see looking toward him.

The focus of that perspective is the pain, and complete agony and suffering of our Lord and Savior…followed by the feeling of sorrow that I played a part in that suffering…through the times of turning my back on Him and through the grievous sins of my life.  That is the image that I usually experienced.

Now, I am viewing the image as Jesus would be seeing  it…looking out.

What first went through my mind was, “Of course He is looking out…He is always looking out in love.”

Then my mind started asking the question, “What was He seeing as He was suffering on that Holy Cross?”

As He struggled to keep His eyes open, through the blood and sweat that must have been dripping down His face, His eyes would have focused on His Mother and her sister, Mary, wife of Clopas, Mary of Magdala, and His beloved Apostle, John.  He saw the love and grief on their faces, and filled them with His Mercy and Pure Love…drawing them in even closer to Himself.

His eyes must have also scanned the empty spots…where were all of His followers? The anguish of being abandoned by His disciples…His Chosen…due to fear and lack of faith, must have added immensely to His suffering.

How do we still add to His suffering, due to our lack of faith, or fear?   How many times do we pass up the opportunity to spend an hour in His Holy Presence  during Adoration, or ignore His invitation to attend the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, and receive His Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity in the Holy Eucharist?   Or how many times do we just go through the motions of attending Mass, and actually go up to The Altar, to receive His Body and Blood, while being in the state of Mortal Sin?  Why do we keep holding on to sins that hinder our relationship with Him…why do we choose not to receive the graces offered to us through the Sacrament of Confession?

When Jesus looked out as He was dying, He saw all of those things. He knew how we would all turn our backs on Him.

He saw those of us that were mocking Him, and those who were choosing the road that leads toward death.  He experienced the reality of our hopelessness and despair, in those that were (or would be) confused and deceived by the evil one.  As He hung on The Cross, He saw the evils that were done in darkness…that separated those hearts from Himself.

And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.”  Luke 23:34

Jesus looked at all of us in our sin, and felt compassion, mercy and love for us.  He reaches out to each one of us, every single day, in many ways.

You know the ways He is reaching out for you.  You already are feeling the little nudges that He blesses you with…how long will you wait to accept His Sacrifice for you?

Take that step of Faith…open your wounded heart to His comforting and healing Presence.  

You were created for just that…to be one with Him.  Reach out for His loving, merciful heart that is reaching for you.

 

https://catholicstand.com/the-mass-calvary-made-present-for-each-generation/

 

 

 

 

Your Choice for Eternity

Christmastide is the perfect time to reflect on where we are in our relationship with Jesus.  The celebration of Advent, the preparations for Christmas Day, are all in the past.  The gifts, parties, baking, and  “glitz” of the season…that could be overwhelming for some…have been replaced with a quietness of spirit.  At least, there is a “quest” for quietness…maybe not fully attained yet!

Jesus is Love and Pure Joy! He loves us in a way that is incomprehensible to us.  He knows us perfectly…knows the struggles within us, and the reasons for those struggles…even when we don’t have a clue of what lies inside of our hearts.

This morning, I was looking through old family and friends photos, and I was reminded of so many blessings throughout the years.  Especially through the “in the trenches” days of early marriage and raising our sons.  During that time, it was clearly a “day to day” learning process, although I didn’t realize that at the time, I just trudged through each day’s events.   I didn’t realize that Jesus was right there with me, as I struggled through the haze of the personal inner struggles that I was beginning to work through.  All I knew at the time, was that I loved my husband and sons more than I could even understand.  I wanted what was best for them in this life.

I did not understand that my role as a wife and mother wasn’t necessarily to work toward their happiness in THIS LIFE…my role was to help them and guide them toward their eternal happiness.

Maybe that’s where we become confused when our life doesn’t go as planned…and sometimes our prayers are not answered in the way we expect them to be.  Only God knows what we truly need to prepare our souls for Eternal Life…with Him.  He showers us with blessings each and everyday.  Sometimes those blessings come disguised as difficulties, struggles and suffering.  We are constantly being given opportunities to turn our gaze away from the material world, and instead, look to Him.

Trust Him, who created you lovingly, and knows you inside and out.  Trust Him, and the Church He has gifted us with…and do all you can to know, love and serve Him in this fleeting world, so that you will be will be with Him…in the presence of Perfect Love and Joy…for all Eternity.

Think carefully about your choices in this life, because they will affect your most important relationship…which is with your Creator and your Savior.

So, during this time of peacefulness and meditation, remember this one thing:

The only thing you take to eternity is your relationship with God.  Everything in your life should tend to that relationship.  

 

Christmas Time

Rejoice, for a child is born for us.  Isaiah 9:6

I would like to share something special that I read before Mass this morning.   This is a gift that I am sharing with you…Merry Christmas!

 

Dearly beloved, today our Savior is born; let us rejoice.  Sadness should have no place on the birthday of life.  The fear of death has been swallowed up; life brings us joy with the promise of eternal happiness.  No one is shut out from this joy; all share the same reason for rejoicing.  Our Lord, victor over sin and death, finding no one free from sin, came to free us all…

 

Christian, remember your dignity, and now that you share in God’s own nature, do not return by sin to your former base condition.  Bear in mind who is your head and of whose body you are a member.  Do not forget that you have been rescued from the power of darkness and brought into the light of God’s kingdom.  Saint Leo the Great

May God bless you and keep you in His loving care!  With much love, Bernadette

 

 

True Gifts of Christmas

This Christmas card touches my heart  all the way through to my core.  It was sent by a lovely lady (and her daughter) that I met at the Assisted Living Community where I had worked before moving to Colorado.

Sometimes, when you meet a person, you just feel a heart connection.  That is how I felt as I got to know Delores.  She was feisty, straight forward, and had a heart of gold.  She had a way of bringing a smile to my face, and somehow always “knew” when I was troubled.

I am sharing this card with you, because to me, it breaks through the “busyness” and sometimes craziness of the season.  All the gifts, parties, and decorations pale in the presence of the simple acts of love that are shared on this beautiful card.

Delores, thank you for the love and smiles that you brought into my life.  And thank you for this special card…it will be displayed during  Christmas for years to come!  I will think of you each time I am reminded of what Christmas is all about…and what the True Gifts of Christmas are.  Those gifts are meant to be given year round, and are healing and life changing for both the giver and the recipient!

Merry Christmas to all!

A Step Forward in Faith

Are you struggling right now?  Do you KNOW something is missing in your life…or maybe experiencing pain, despair, confusion, or doubt that there is a God that loves you?

There is a way to move closer and closer to Jesus.  There is a way to find inner peace even as you tread through the storms of your day to day life. There is a way to truly have faith in God, and know that He is there for you. Always.

KNOWING Jesus will fill you with such a deep love and faith… life will change for you!

This video is the testimony of young men who have experienced miraculous change in their lives after making the decision to pray the rosary.  Listen to their stories, listen to how their hearts (and lives) were changed.  Our Blessed Mother loves us so much, that she desires to bring us closer to her son.  She loves YOU that much…trust her to love you through your struggles, as any loving mother would, and trust her to lead you to the saving grace of Jesus.

Praying/meditating on the mysteries of the rosary is changing my heart and my life…in unbelievable ways.  Are you ready to take a step forward in faith?  May God be with you on your faith journey.

The One Thing Necessary

Wanted to share something I read today…it breaks through all of the excuses and defenses that we (I) carry.

The One Thing Necessary

“We all in a way harden our hearts a little bit; some to the point where they no longer hear the Word of God at all. There is always that one person that you haven’t totally forgiven or loved with a pure love. There is still that one thing you won’t give up for Jesus. You are still capping your love. You do everything but this one thing. Well, do it today.”

I don’t know about you, but I have a few things that are “capping my love.”  Mother Angelica has a way of speaking the Truth straight to the heart!  May we pray for the grace needed to help us give Jesus our all.

Taken from Mother Angelica’s Little Book of Life Lessons and Everyday Spirituality (Page 130)

 

Missing my Mom

Out to Dinner
Bernadette and Mom

Today is my mother’s birthday.  She passed away seven years ago, at the age of 88.

I am really missing her today.

Due to the intricacies and craziness that weaved the fabric of our family, I did not feel close with my mother growing up.  I loved her because she was my mom.  She was always there in our home, making sure that we were safe and well fed.  She had her own issues that she suffered through her whole life, that I was completely oblivious to.  All I knew was that I loved her and she loved me…however, we did not know eachother’s hearts during those years.  Due to the dynamics of our family, that revolved around the care of my quadriplegic older sister, there were no long mother/daughter talks, lunches out, shopping excursions or anything else that I imagine mothers and daughters doing together.

All of that would change when my father passed away.  My mom was unable to live on her own, so my husband and I invited her to live with us.  After a little prodding by my hubby, she decided to move from Ohio to our Virgina home, and lived with us for about 11 years.  As I get older, I am more able to understand how difficult that decision must have been for her.  She had lived in that home, (and raised four daughters in it) for decades.  We helped her to sell her home, which meant giving away and throwing away most of the material things that were attached to her heart as memories.

Now looking back, my heart is opened up to the grace that my mom exhibited through the move, growing older, and living with my husband and me.  She was a bit of a hoarder, along with my dad, as they grew older and less able.  Although it was extremely hard for her, she allowed me and my sister to clean out her house, save the things that we knew she would want to keep, and then move her into our home.

That move changed everything.  Although I was secretly hoping for that “magical” mother and daughter relationship to develop, what I was blessed with was learning the reality of who my mother was, and I also learned so much about myself in the process.

Learning about and accepting yourself is more of a struggle than I ever realized…and the serendipity in that, is that learning about yourself usually leads you to learn about others.  Both my mom and I had layers upon layers to be peeled away.  Her layers were even more stubborn than mine, and many remained tightly shut.  I learned to respect that in her…and learned to love who she was instead of who I thought she should be.

So, Happy Birthday, Mom!  I wish you were here so we could share some of your Coconut Birthday Cake that you loved so much.  And I could watch your eyes light up while opening a new Barbie Doll for your collection, or your favorite body care lotions and sprays, or some sparkly piece of jewelry.  Small things brought you joy, and you passed that trait on to me.

I am remembering simple, sweet moments that we shared together.  At the time, I had no idea of the value of those moments.  But I think you did…and I thank you for being the mother that you were to me, and for the love that you shared with me and our family, in your own unique way.

Some of the moments that bring smiles to my heart:

You always praised my cooking and baking.  When even I knew it was pretty bad, you would say, “That was different!”

When we would shop at Costo while I was pushing you in your wheelchair and you were pushing a cart ahead of the wheelchair.  You would have me pile so many items in the cart that I could hardly see to navigate your chair.

You insisted on buying  a “Grabber” for me.  I fought you on it, because I was “not old and didn’t need one.”  I think of you each time I use that thing!

You always had childlike wonder during holidays.  You loved things that reminded you of years past…and the years of raising us girls.  Some of those things that brought you joy were Jelly Beans, Easter Peeps, Candy Corn, Ribbon Candy, Flowers, Wreaths, Candles…the list goes on.  Christmas music and Christmas cards.  I miss writing our cards together, and reading the little notes you added to your cards.

You always thought of others.  Little gifts for friends/loved ones.  Many prayers each day that you offered for so many.  I am sure those prayers saved me on more than one occasion.

I miss the way you looked up at me over your cute reading glasses, to ask me how my day at work was.

I miss the way you insisted on seeing my outfit when I was leaving for work or an event, and always complimenting me. (it was nice to hear even if I did not always feel that I looked the way you said I did!)

I miss your blue eyes, and the way they teared up at Mass.

I miss the way you talked about how much you loved all of us sisters, and our growing families.

I especially miss the way you overlooked all of my weaknesses and loved me as I am.

I miss the way YOU NEVER GAVE UP.

Mom, you are loved and missed.  Hopefully, you are able to see those of us that are still living in this world, and you can feel the love we carry in our hearts for you, through the veil of heaven and earth.

Rest in the Love of The Lord. Until we meet again…

1 Peter 3:4: “You should be known for the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.”

Deuteronomy 4:9: “Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”

Luke 2:51: “And his mother treasured up all these things in her heart.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reverence in Thought and Dress

This last Sunday I saw something at Mass that greatly troubled me. I waited a few days to speak of it, because I wanted to make sure that my heart was/is in the right place before bringing up this sensitive topic….modesty and appropriate, reverent dress when in Church and/or attending the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.

My husband and I were sitting toward the back of the Church. When I saw what was written in large letters on the back of a woman’s tee shirt, (not sure of age or what was written on the front) I was just about moved to tears. In large letters it read….”YOU CAN’T EAT THIS.”

Wow…so sad that someone would think that was ok.

This is in God’s Church. The True Physical Body and Blood of Jesus is in the Tabernacle, and is being offered FOR US on the altar during Mass. If we truly understood the glory and majesty of God, and understood that He is fully present in the Holy Eucharist, we would know that it is a gift from God… that we are privileged to attend Mass and be in His Presence.

There are many ways that we show reverence, and one of those ways is putting thought into the way we dress…being that we will be in the Presence of Almighty God. I have seen many sad displays of dress (and “undress”), and have also once witnessed a teenaged girl with a short miniskirt applying lotion up and down her legs. There may be legitimate reasons for wrinkled shorts and tee shirts at Mass…I have also dressed in ways that I would never even consider now.

I guess, what I am trying to say, is to dress appropriately for an intimate visit with God. (as we would dress for any “special” occasion) Put thought into your preparation, in your choice of clothing, and also your state of mind and heart.

Don’t be afraid to gently speak with those you know and love, if their manner of dress or demeanor is not reverent.

May God have mercy on us and keep us in His care. JMJ

Reach Out Now!

Sometimes, the feelings that we keep hidden deep inside, are set free by unexpectant glimmers and moments.  For me, those feelings were released in a tangible way while I was grocery shopping a few days before Easter.

I have always especially loved Easter for what it means to me spiritually, and also for the traditions that were shared with me by my parents and family. I have attempted to pass those same traditions to my sons and their families, however, they do not hold Easter and traditions as close to their hearts as I have and still do…meaning that I was trying to celebrate Easter in a new way…without sharing Easter Mass, Easter baskets, flowers, colored eggs or a special Easter Dinner with our whole family.  It is a time of change for me, and I am working on what that truly means.

So… I needed to pick up some groceries, and when I enterd the store, I was overcome with the beauty of all the flowers that were being displayed for Easter/Spring.  Of course I LOVE flowers, and started to make my way up and down the displays…admiring the beauty.  As I was taking in the joy of all those arrangements, I was overcome with emotion.

I don’t have my mom anymore, to buy flowers for. I no longer have my mother in law  to buy flowers for.  And now I don’t have my sister, who was also like a mother to me,  to buy flowers for.  

In that one moment, such sadness welled up inside of me, that it was hard to leave that spot and keep on going.

Now, Mothers Day is on its way, and there will be no cards for me to send, and no flowers to buy.  The three women who were there for me, and who I loved immensely are just gone.  They live in my heart, however, they are no longer there for me to show love and gratitude for all the ways that they impacted my life.  

The older I get, the more I realize that the most important things in this world are love and relationships.  Actually, when I think of it, they are the ONLY important things in this world, because love and relationships are the pieces of ourelves that we leave to the world when we die.

Everything else disappears from reality when the ones you love are taken from you.

Be aware of the “loves” in your life. Share your time and your heart with them.  Take the time to bring happiness into their lives.  Flowers and love are meant to be shared during life…don’t put off and wait to bring joy to others.  Do it now.  

We never know what tomorrow will bring, or how long we will have with those that we love and that love us.

Reach out now…  

To those that are close to you, and also to all those that may need an extra little gift of love to get through their day.  We all know of or come across many through our day to day life, that are suffering inside, due to loneliness.  Reach out now…while you still have the opportunity.

May God bless all of us, and open our eyes to the needs of others.  We are all here for eachother…let’s find ways to lighten the burdens that are kept well hidden within the hearts of so many.