An Adventure of Love

My husband and I will be married 38 years on April Fool’s Day. (funny we chose that day, huh?)  Our life together has been an adventure up to this point.   With our sons and their wives living across country, and now our first

The Beginning of Something Good

grandchild being so far away from us, our lives are being lead to an oncoming  season of change and even more adventure.

This morning, as we were commuting to work together,  a quick flash of memories filled my head.

The first moment Joe and I locked eyes.

I was seventeen, and he was 18.  He always says that he knew I was “the one” since the first time he laid eyes on me, when I went in to the “Strouss Terrace Room Restaurant”, interviewing for a part time waitress position.  He was a bus boy.  We were seniors in different high schools, and were both referred to that particular restaurant through family members.  The manager of the restaurant was Esther, who had been a friend of my mother’s when they were teens.  Esther loved my mom and would have hired me without an interview.

Funny how each and every decision, and every person we meet, has a purpose in either our future, or someone else’s.

My vision this morning was the moment we first saw each other as naïve teens, and then flashes of our life together since that moment.

I saw Joe with his arm around me, pulling me in for our first kiss.  He, with his light sprinkling of freckles, and his beautiful, warm, liquid brown eyes.  I felt safe when I was with him, like I was “home.”

I saw us walking down the aisle in “The Little Chapel of Bells” in California, and vowing to take each other from that day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance.     We did not understand what those words meant at the time, (of course we thought we did!) however, we have gone through so much together since then, and understand the “for better for worse” part very well now.

I saw the birth of our two sons, and how they changed us for the better.  Change never comes easy…children are one of God’s ways of teaching us what it means to really love and be selfless.  That change and growth takes a lifetime, and the Lord works His will through us in a way that we don’t even realize what is happening.  Funny how we always think we are in charge and we think we know so much…as Our Heavenly Father weaves everlasting beauty out of  the  messes we create with the rags of our “we can do it ourselves” mentality.

I saw the misery of the times when we were both so unhappy, and were right on the edge of giving up and divorcing…because although we both knew we loved each other, we had no clue about what marriage really meant, and even less of a clue on how to be happy.  That was until we locked eyes one more time, through tears, and made the decision to stay married and learn how to be happy. 

That was also the moment that we invited God into our marriage, and asked for His help.  He did not let us down.  Even when we didn’t realize it, He was working in the unseen…leading and guiding us toward Him.  Especially when we were stumbling and falling time after time.

I saw our two sons as babies, little boys, teenagers, and as the men they are now.  They, and their beautiful wives, have brought true joy into our lives.

Blessed by Timeless Love

Then I saw the face of our new grandson, and the reality of what God started so many years ago is shining through those beautiful, clear blue eyes! 

And the thought hit me…this is just the beginning.

So many more blessings ahead for each and every one of us, as we continue to keep our hearts open to Jesus and simply trust Him, who loves us.

 

For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.  Philippians 1:6

 

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The Fullness of Spirit

For a few years now I have been feeling something that I could not put my finger on, or explain to myself or anyone else.  Experiencing my mom’s last few days with her, before her death, intensified that mystical feeling within me.  Those days with my mother, truly a blessing, could only be described as overwhelming, intense love; a fullness in the physical space around me, spilling over into the interior of my heart and spirit.

That is the word to describe the feeling…fullness.  Since I have become closer to Jesus, and filled with the Holy Spirit, my being feels more dimensional and “full.”  No matter what is happening in the world, or around me in my personal life, that fullness inside me helps to keep me grounded in The Truth.  It helps me to look past whatever the physical or material reality is, and try to look at things through the eyes of the Lord.  Or is it the eyes of the Lord, who lives within me, looking through mine?

This fullness in the Lord helps me to react in a different way than when I was more hollow and one dimensional.   There are many dark spaces in my heart that the Lord is continuously revealing, forgiving, and healing, and  I know there is much spiritual growth ahead of me.  However, this feeling of deep love and joy…this fullness…

Helps me to see beyond:

The ones who arrogantly defy Jesus Christ and the Christians who follow Him.  It used to frighten me, and cause me to feel intimidated and angry.  Now I can see past their anger and pride.  When I look into their eyes or see the fruits of their lives, I see the hollowness.  I see the empty hole that they allowed to be filled with the demons and darkness of Satan.  And instead of judging them, I have empathy and compassion for them and pray for their conversion.  I pray for their hearts to be filled with the tender mercy and saving grace of Jesus.

People who are hard to be around; the ones who only see negative in all situations and just can’t seem to ever be happy.  I used to try to stay away from these people, because their negativity seemed to transfer straight to my core.  Not only could I not help them, but I would internalize and feel their darkness, and could not even help myself.  Now I have learned that I can not heal or fix them or myself.  The Lord reveals their heart to me, and helps me to look past actions or demeanors.  I pray that the Lord touches their hearts and illuminates the darkness that they are not even aware of.

Those that stand proud, because all in their lives is going “just as planned.”   They planned, did the work that needed to be done, and now they are basking in their accomplishments.  They are under the impression that they are the total reason for their success.  That all those other “less fortunate” people just didn’t do the right things…just didn’t work hard enough.  Their education, status, decision making skills, or their “genius” is what sets them apart from everyone else.  With no inkling at  all that “Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.” James 1:17   Knowing what I know from living the years of my life and seeing the ebbs and flows, I know that life will not always be “just the way they planned.”  I know there will be struggles and heartache.  So, I pray that the Lord reveals Himself to them, and opens their eyes, ears, and hearts to His saving love. And that they will have a solid foundation of faith through the storms that will come.

The evils that are evident in our world every day.  Those who are in rebellion against all that is Good, through blatant acts of sacrilege, perversity, unspeakable horrors of torture, abuse, murder, and the sacrifice and murder of babies in the womb.  When the evil of their actions are called out for what they are, the vileness of their spirits are revealed.  Have you ever witnessed the evil and hatred that spews out of the mouths that defend these behaviors?  You can actually feel a demonic presence, hear it in their voices, and see the blackness in their eyes.  In the past, I would have felt intense anger, fear and would have been judgmental.  Now, I am aware of the demons that reside in their spirits, and I am sad for them.  I show my love by praying for the Lord’s mercy on their souls, and for their conversion and healing.

Those who live their lives in quiet faith; that even though they stumble and fall along the way, they try to always live in the Lord’s Presence.  They seem content in their hearts and have a peace about them that is undeniable.   In the past, I would actually look for flaws…to make them more “real” to me.  Sometimes I still do that at times, I am ashamed to admit.  However, the Lord is guiding me to look beyond the physical, and focus on the hearts.  Everyone, no matter what their circumstance or what their life appears to be, needs prayers.  They need the Lord’s strength and grace in their lives, and I feel called to pray for all the Lord places in my life.

This fullness of spirit calls me to grow in His Love and His Presence.  It calls me to appreciate the communion of saints, and the power of prayer.  It calls me to follow and imitate the mercy of Jesus.

How is the Lord Jesus calling you?

Thank you, Jesus, for the mercy and love you bestow on me each and every day!  Please work through me to touch other hearts in need, especially when  I am at my weakest.

 

Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm.  Ephesians 6:11-13

 

 

 

Welcome to Our World!

Yesterday our first grandchild was born, and our little world was once again changed in a way we could not imagine.    Little sweet Brayden opened his eyes after a very long labor, to finally break through into the sights, sounds and feel  of this world.

I thought I already loved my son and daughter in law as much as humanly possible.  I thought wrong.  After sharing in their experience long distance,  the intensity and scope of pain that  my daughter in law, Melissa endured, and watching my son, Joe, being there for her, my heart is just overflowing in love for them and for this sweet baby who will change their hearts and lives forever.  The struggle and pain of the labor that Melissa suffered through was evident.  However, sometimes, we are never fully aware of the pain and helplessness that is felt when one  is called to watch a loved one suffer.  Joe was there to support and help to make his wife as comfortable as possible, however, he was unable to take away or lessen her pain.

Melissa was the chosen one for this particular labor of love.  She was the one who said yes when she received the news of pregnancy.  She was the one who chose to be more aware than usual of what she ate, drank and participated in during her pregnancy.  She was the one who sacrificed each day…to assist God with the miracle growing inside of her.

She said yes to this divine purpose for her life at this time.    Joe said yes to being her husband; to being there always to love, honor, respect, and protect her and this new baby, in any way that it took.  And yesterday, that meant saying yes to being helpless as he watched his wife suffer so much pain.

Little Brayden has already started the change that will occur in all the lives he touches.  When my husband and I look at the pictures of our new grandson, we see a miracle.  It is almost overwhelming that our son now has a son.  We also know how the Lord will use this little one to mold and teach all of us…but most of all, his parents.  They will learn love in a way they never thought possible.  They will learn what it truly means to be selfless.  They will experience joy like never before, but will also experience doubts, confusion, frustration, and the ups and downs that life brings.

Each one of us has a unique purpose, and must journey down the individual road that God has paved for us.  We all have our own vocations and gifts.  For Joe and Melissa their journey is starting with their newborn son that God blessed them with.  For others it might be a different path.  However, the path that the Lord paves for all of us is in love and through love…and is meant to draw us closer to Him. 

Will we choose to say yes?

Welcome to our world and to our family, baby Brayden!  We thank God for you and look forward to being a part of your life, watching you grow, and learning from your innocence and wide-eyed wonder!